Thursday, October 18, 2012

Fears


My son has always had a fascination with scary movies.  It's something he inherited from my wife.  He loved reading the Goosebumps series and going to the classic horror film series our library had (showing movies like The Blob).  But his interest is tempered with a fear of the dark and of monsters.  We have prayed with him, shared with him how God is bigger than his fears, and that God did not give him that spirit of fear.  Now, fear of monsters is a childish one that he will outgrow, but there are other fears that Benjamin struggles with that we, as his parents have to be open to and discuss with him.  On the way home from school today, I got to do just that.

In my head today, I have been meditating on God's fingerprints and how they are all over this adoption process (something I will blog about on another day), and so I wanted to ask Benjamin about God's fingerprints.  I started off by asking him simply, "What do you think it means to have the fingerprints of God on something?"

"It means that God has touched it."

"What have you seen that has God's touch on it?"

"Ministers.  Missionaries," were his first answers.  Then he began to get more specific to his own life, "How God got me into my school when I wanted to go to another one."

"What about in this adoption that we're involved in?"

His answer was not at all what I expected. "Yeah.  He is there with me when I'm afraid."

"What about the adoption are you afraid of?"

"I get scared about us going to another country and finding just the right child for our family.  I'm afraid of how this will change our family."

"So what do you do when you're afraid?"

"I ask God to help me."

"And does He?"

"Yeah.  Because He lets me know He is going with us and that He has a child picked out for us."

Now one thing I believe strongly in is being honest with him, so I admitted to Benjamin that, like him, I get scared about this adoption, too.

"You do?"

"Uh-huh.  I start thinking about how big this whole adoption is and about how we are leaving where we are comfortable (our home, our daily routines, etcetera) and going to a foreign country for a few weeks where we don't speak the language and don't know where we'll be going in that country to meet a child who will become part of our family.  I get nervous about having a child in our home that doesn't speak English and who's grown up in an orphanage and has already faced so much in their young life."

"So what do you do when you're afraid?"

"Same thing that you do.  I pray to God."

"And does He help you?"

"Yes.  Like He does with you, He lets me know that He is with us in all of this and that this is all apart of His plan."

Benjamin smiled and said, "God is so cool, isn't He?"

"Yeah.  He really is."





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