Monday, May 5, 2014


Adoption can bring some of the deepest joys you will ever experience.

For those who've followed this blog for some time know, our family has definitely experienced the ups and downs that come with international adoption. Yet what I have found is that it is because of those really hard times that those moments of joy are even more joyful. What most of us would not normally pay any attention to, the smallest of victories become the greatest of celebrations because of the work it took to get to them.

Adoption is a journey that begins in loss and pain but often ends in love and joy. So often it's the hardest moments that have led to us being the closest. As the Bible tells us, "Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith leads to perseverance" (James 1:2-3). Adoption is process that is both painful and miraculous!

Adoption is an answer to prayer. We delight in the joy of knowing that God had all of this planned and that He took our family and a boy from Ukraine, brought us together, and made us into a family that we now cannot imagine any other way.

Adoption is about choice. Cava loves that we flew to other side of the world and picked him out of all the other children we were shown. He delights in me telling him the story of how he came to be a part of a family. It gives him joy to know that he was picked because that means he was wanted. He likes to be reminded of this again and again and again.

Adoption has given me greater insight into the heart of the Father because it shows me that all great love comes at a cost. Many, many times Cava has rejected us and our love but when he finally allowed himself to be loved and to love back, it was only then that he began to heal and experience peace. How much like that is us to our heavenly Father?

These children are hurt and broken when they come to us. They are in need of love, patience, grace, and hope. Only by allowing God to work in our families and by giving our families totally to Him can we even begin to experience true joy and love.

Adoption and the process of adoption means letting go of the life we had planned for ourselves to let God give us the life He has for us. It's not always an easy one.  The road to adoption and the road after can often be full of heartaches, questioning, and doubts. It is full of the question, "Can we really do this?" All of it is exhausting but nothing worth having comes easily. If you think the road to adoption is easy just look at the one Christ took to bring us into God's family. Yet the cost was the cross which led to us being His children.

Cava may not have our DNA, but he has our hearts and our love, which are what truly make us mother and father and son. Cava was not born of my wife's womb, but he was born of our hopes, our dreams, our prayers, and our hearts. We rejoice in this and celebrate not only how Cava came to be in our family but that he is one of us forever. There is a joy in seeing how he responds to being accepted and loved for the first time in his life.

His smile, his exuberance, and his laughter bring us joy. Not a day passes that we do not thank God for this gift.

And how could we not delight in this?

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